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I have found a name for my pain and it is job hunting. I've have learned that in all the years I've spent working I still haven't gained enough experience...fuck it. Tonight I work a show at the Beat Kitchen and it's a good one. Dead Science, Home Recording Project, and Shoemaker Levy. I plan on grabbing a bite to eat their before work and trying my hardest to refrain from summoning any distilled spirits.

On Halloween I turn 27, that's right, I'll be 27. My age is a question I have often avoided from people I don't know well...not sure why exactly...but I did and I'll do it again. Thoughts of sitting on the beach in Florida over 11 years ago after Kurt Cobain killed himself come to mind and I remember thinking that I'll never live past 27. I was 15 naive and selfish. Not a lot has changed but I am changing...it's a process. So maybe it will be the last year of my life expectancy after all but not all deaths are physical and not all of them are bad. I've had growing up to do but it's scary because I'm so much older. At least I have Halloween and friends to share it with...and Jason will be right there with me...the good twin.

6 years ago when I turned 21...Jason, my brother, and I all went to see Thrill Kill Kult at the Metro to celebrate our new found adult hood. Nothing like a night of Satan and dancing girls in tight spandex to make you feel all grown up.

Anyway I won't go all into it yet since I still have over a week to go...but I can't help but feel happy this year. For the first time in a while I'm looking forward to being another year older. Just wish the Lombards were coming down to help celebrate.

Its the same its the same in the whole wide world.